This piece is killing me, It's soooooooooo cool:

THE PHYSICISTS' BILL OF RIGHTS

Author Unknown

We hold these postulates to be intuitively obvious, that all
physicists are born equal, to a first approximation, and are endowed
by their creator with certain discrete privilieges, among them a mean
rest life, n degrees of freedom, and the following rights, which are
invariant under all linear transformations:

I. To approximate all problems to ideal cases.
II. To use order of magnitude calculations whenever deemed
necessary (i.e., whenever one can get away with it).
III. To use the rigorous method of "squinting" for solving problems
more complex than the additions of positive integers.
IV. To dismiss all functions which diverge as "nasty" and
"unphysical".
V. To invoke the uncertainty principle whenever confronted by
confused mathematicians, chemists, engineers, psychologists,
dramatists, and andere Schweinhunde.
VI. To the extensive use of "bastard notations" where conventional
mathematics will not work.
VII. To justify shaky reasoning on the basis that it gives the
right answer.
VIII. To cleverly choose convenient initial conditions, using the
principle of general triviality.
IX. To use plausible arguments in place of proofs, and
henceforth refer to those arguments as proofs. ( in kheyli baahaal-e!!:)))
X. To take on faith any principle which seems right but cannot
be proved.